


Ohtori Academy: A Contemporary Musical

by CelianAdellanie



Category: Utena
Genre: Humor, Parody
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-16
Updated: 2015-01-11
Packaged: 2015-02-04 07:14:58
Rating: K+
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,125
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10830879/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/6054705/CelianAdellanie
Summary: Ever wonder what Ohtori Academy would be like if it was a musical made of parodies of modern pop songs? Yeah, me neither. Whatever the case, here it is. Laugh, cry, or throw your advanced biology textbook at the computer screen in anger. Please note that I do not own any of the songs parodied first multipart fic, so please RxR. I value input and song suggestions.





	1. Act 1 Scene 1

Ohtori Academy: A Contemporary Musical

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own SKU or KE$HA'S "Tik Tok". A rather odd combination, as it were.**

Act 1, Scene 1

The bells rang, and Utena jumped out of bed, almost hitting the ceiling. She landed perfectly on the ground, already dressed in her signature boy's uniform. Her bubblegum pink hair swished down to fall on her back. Himemiya was already in the kitchen, so all Utena had to do to tidy the room was make her bed. Or at least try to. In a moment, Himemiya would rush over, protesting that the duelist shouldn't do housework. She sang as she tucked in the sheets.

"Wake up in the mornin' feeling like Prince Dios

Got my bride I'm out the door I'm gonna hit the Arena

Before I leave, brush my teeth with some rose petal jam,

'Cause when I leave for the duel I might not come back."

Then Himemiya came in and snatched the duvet, saying "Miss Utena, please don't worry about the housework."

"Come on, Himemiya, you have to let me do something," Utena complained.

"Don't worry about it." Himemiya smiled. Utena rolled her eyes and went back to singing as she brushed her teeth.

"I'm talkin' epaulettes on my clothes, clothes,

fancy white dueling rose, rose,

ornate Sword of Dios, oh.

Na na I'm dueling crazy Saionji,

pitying hopeful Miki,

trying not to lose to Juri."

They went to breakfast, ChuChu latching onto Utena's shoulder. Utena pulled out a chair for Himemiya, then sat down herself.

"Don't stop, make it pop, build the Revolution up

Tonight, I'mma fight for that garden sunlight

Tick tock on the clock eternity don't stop,

I'm like woah~ oh, woah~ oh."

Utena grabbed her bookbag, Himemiya changed into her uniform, and they started to school. ChuChu danced, Utena skipped, and Himemiya glided.

"Ain't got no parents in the world, but got plenty of bling

Ain't got no castle to call my own, but I got a rose ring.

Now the bishies linin' up cause they hear we got swagger,

But we kick em to the curb because they don't really matter."

Utena slapped away Touga's hand trying to touch her hair and they continued down the hall. Himemiya had a hand pressed to her smiling mouth.

"I'm talkin' about roses turning insane colors,

conniving chairmen and mothers,

super touchy creepy brothers,

but nobody kicks them out, out.

No police to shut them down, down.

Maybe a prince can shut them down~..."

Ohtori Academy joined in except for Akio Ohtori, making a chorus that the shadow girls delighted in as they followed Utena to the Chairman's building.

"Don't stop, make it pop, build the Revolution up

Tonight, I'mma fight for that garden sunlight

Tick tock on the clock eternity don't stop,

I'm like woah~ oh, woah~ oh.

"Don't stop, make it pop, build the Revolution up

Tonight, I'mma fight for that garden sunlight

Tick tock on the clock eternity don't stop,

I'm like woah~ oh, woah~ oh."

Utena and Anthy cried, "For the revolution of the world!" and Utena pulled the sword of Dios out. The Prince to Be marched up to Akio, pointing the blade at his neck. her boy's uniform turned into a pink rose bride dress.

"My prince, you build me up, you break me down.

My heart, it pounds, yeah you got me.

Put yours hands up

The jig's up now

Fall to the ground

Yeah we got you!"

Utena sliced the skirts of her dress so that the skirt was short, then took her red shorts from Himemiya and cut the remains of the dress into a rose-colored jacket.

"Don't stop, make it pop, build the Revolution up

Tonight, I'mma fight for that garden sunlight

Tick tock on the clock eternity don't stop,

I'm like woah~ oh, woah~ oh.

"Don't stop, make it pop, build the Revolution up

Tonight, I'mma fight for that garden sunlight

Tick tock on the clock eternity don't stop,

I'm like woah~ oh, woah~ oh."

Everyone cornered Akio. And then he jumped onto his red convertible and rode off. Utena grumbled.

"At least we had good practice for tomorrow, Miss Utena," Himemiya said cheerfully.


	2. Act 1 Scene 2

**DISCLAIMER: I do not own SKU or "Livin my Life" by Rihanna and T.I., a oddly fitting combination as may be.**

Act 1 Scene 2

Mikage sat in the elevator waiting for another person to drop by. He started to sing to himself as he sat back in his chair.

"Ma ya hee, ma ya haa. Ma ha hoo, ma ya ha ha.

Ma ya hee, ma ya haa."

"It's a special what's haapnin' to all my," Mamiya cut in, handing Mikage a black rose.

"Ma ha hoo, ma ya ha ha."

"All my duelists with your hearts of black."

"Ma ya hee, ma ya haa."

"'Errbody in the arena."

"Ma ha hoo, ma ya ha ha."

"What you need to do is be hateful of the love you got, know what I'm saying?"

"Ma ya hee, ma ya haa."

"Start looking at what you ain't got and stop being thankful for what you do got."

"Ma ha hoo, ma ya ha ha."

"Let's give it to 'em, baby cyborg." Mikage poured tea for them, then turned on his computer.

"You're gonna be a duelist star," he sang.

"That's right."

"With frilly clothes and heartbreak sca-ars.

"Hey, hey, hey, yeah."

"And then you'll see, you'll never go far."

"Go, hey."

"Cause Utena knows, just who you a-are."

"Mikage, let's get it!"

Kanae walked down the hall, following the arrows. The door shut and the sign turned to "In Use".

"Ay!"

"So kill the Bride!"

"Ay!, Ay ay ay."

"You steady chasing that prince girl."

"Ay!"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Oh!, Ay ay ay."

"Ain't got no time for no princes."

"Ain't got time for 'em; burning buildings, kiddies."

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Ay!, Ay ay ay."

"No telling where it'll take you,"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Oh!, ay ay ay. Hey yo, We did it again, genius!"

"I'm an eternity chaser."

"Follow the staircase up."

"Just kill the Bride!" The elevator clunked to a stop, and Kanae stood up shakily.

"The Bride!"

"Oh!"

"The Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh! Put your hands up!"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh!"

"The Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh! Let me see you put your hands up!" Mamiya thrust the rose into Kanae's chest, and Mikage slipped the black rose crest onto her finger.

"Hey, Never mind what adults say, ignore them 'til they fade away

Amazing they ungrateful for after all the game I gave away

Safe to say I paved the way, for your duels to get fought today

You'd still be wasting days away, now had I never saved the day

Consider them my protege, homage I think they should pay

Instead of being gracious, they violate in a major way

I always been a hater, still I love them in a crazy way!"

Mamiya rapped, jumping on pulled out Black Rose Boy coffins as if they were stairs.

"Some say they so yay and no they couldn't get love on St. V's Day

It ain't that rosy pink it has an area that's spotted all 'round black and gray

I'm dark side anyway, even if I left today and stayed away

Some move away to make a way not move away cause they afraid

I brought back to the school and all you ever did was take away

I pray for patience but they make me wanna melt their face away

Like I once gave them pay, now I could make them spend their life away

Been studyin' all my life, can't say I don't deserve to take a break

If you ever see me catch a case, and watch eternity fade away."

"I'm gonna be a duelist star," Kanae sang, arms hooked with Mikage and Mamiya.

"That's right!" Mamiya crowed.

"With frilly clothes and heartbreak sca-ars.

"Hey, hey, hey, yeah."

"And then you'll see, you'll never go far."

"Go, hey."

"Cause Utena knows, just who you a-are," Mikage reminded.

"Mikage, let's get it!"

Kanae strode down the rows of desks with vases of lilies on display.

"Ay!"

"So kill the Bride!"

"Ay!, Ay ay ay."

"You steady chasing that white rose."

"Ay!"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Oh!, Ay ay ay."

"Ain't got no time for no princes."

"Ain't got time for 'em; burning buildings, kiddies."

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Ay!, Ay ay ay."

"No telling where it'll take you,"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Oh!, ay ay ay. Hey yo, We did it again, genius!"

"I'm an eternity chaser."

"Follow the staircase up."

"Just kill the Bride!" The elevator clunked to a stop, and Kanae stood up shakily.

"The Bride!"

"Oh!"

"The Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh! Put your hands up!"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh!"

"The Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh! Let me see you put your hands up!" Utena arrived and looked at Kanae in horror. The duel started.

Mikage rapped in Nemuro Memorial hall.

"I'm the opposite of moderate, immaculately polished with

The spirit of a genius and the love life of a college kid

Allergic to nobility, undermining the politics

Articulate but still would grab a duelist by the collar quick."

He drank his water, watching Miki sitting in the other chair.

"Whoever having problems with, their dueling records just make 'em yip

If that don't work and all else fails, then turn around and

I got love for the game but ay I'm not in love with all of it

Will do without the fame and the duelists nowadays are comedy.

"The cryin' and the seducin', back and forth with the arguing

Where's your sword, who's your soul, what you desire and the racing car you in

It's as though you lost sight of what's important with the positive

And messes with the power and you fallin' into melancholy

Your values is a disarray, prioritizing horribly

Unhappy with your riches cause you're love is poor morally

Ignoring all prior advice and forewarning

And we mighty full of ourselves all of a sudden aren't we?"

Miki left the room, and Mikage stared after him. He stood up, then headed to the dueling arena to watch the fight take place. He stood on the balcony, using Touga's opera glasses to watch the fight.

"You're gonna be a duelist star," he sang.

"That's right."

"With frilly clothes and heartbreak sca-ars.

"Hey, hey, hey, yeah."

"And then you'll see, you'll never go far."

"Go, hey."

"Cause Utena knows, just who you a-are."

"Mikage, let's get it!"

"Ay!"

"So kill the Bride!"

"Ay!, Ay ay ay."

"You steady chasing that prince girl."

"Ay!"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Oh!, Ay ay ay."

"Ain't got no time for no princes."

"Ain't got time for 'em; burning buildings, kiddies."

Utena flipped backwards to avoid Kanae's oncoming blow.

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Ay!, Ay ay ay."

"No telling where it'll take you,"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Oh!, ay ay ay. Hey yo, We did it again, genius!"

"I'm an eternity chaser."

"Follow the staircase up."

"Just kill the Bride!" "The Bride!"

"Oh!"

"The Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh! Put your hands up!"

"Just kill the Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh!"

"The Bride!"

"Ay!"

"The Bride!"

"Oh! Let me see you put your hands up!" Black rose petal fluttered on air filled with the pealing of bells. Kanae slumped to the ground, and the desks blocked into place. Utena walked over to her sadly and sang.

"Got everybody watching what I do

Come walk in my shoes

And see the way I'm livin' if you really want to

Got my mind on eternity, and I'm not going away

So keep on gettin' 'ya soul sword,"

"Ah!" Chuchu joined in.

"And keep on climbin'"

"Ah!"

"Look in the mirror,"

"Ah!"

"And stop your whinin'

"Whinin'!"

"'Til the game end,

'Til the clock stop,

We 'gon post up on the castle top

Protectin' my Bride!"

"My Bride!"

"My Bride!"

"My Bride!"

"Ma ya haa!" Mikage sang evilly.

Himemiya and Utena helped Kanae off the ground.

"Got a way to eternity," he whispered.

"Ma ya hoo!" Mamiya agreed.

Got my black rose boys on a mission to kill the bride."

"Ma ya ha ha, ma ya hee."

"The Bride!"

"Ma ya haa!"

"I'll kill her and switch her with you!"

"Ma ya hoo!"

"You'll be my bride!"

"Your bride?!"

"You'll be my bride!"

"Your bride?!"

"You, I will never lose!"

"You'll be my bride!"

"Your bride?!"

"I don't need Tokiko!"

"Ma ya hee, ma ya haa

Ma ya hoo, ma ya ha ha

Ma ya hee, ma ya haa

Ma ya hoo, ma ya ha ha!" Mikage sang soulfully, getting much too into it.

"Sempai?" Mamiya asked tentatively. "Is that, hmm, I don't know, inappropriate?"

"Shut up, Mamiya! You're an invalid child who only survives for me to project the illusion of love I wish requited upon!"

"But Sempai*, this is getting weird!"

"Ma ya hee, ma ya haa

Ma ya hoo, ma ya ha ha

Ma ya hee, ma ya haa

Ma ya hoo, ma ya ha ha!"

"Phew!" Mamiya sighed. "At least that's over!"

"Here," Mikage said, pushing a rose bride dress into Mamiya's hands.

"Excuse my language, Sempai, but what the hell is this for?"

"You'll be my bride!"

"Uggh!" Mamiya groaned angrily. In anger, he bashed the lever of the elevator.

"Zounds!" Mikage said, flying out of his seat as the elevator dropped down.

"What kind of swear word is 'zounds'?" The elevator crashed to the bottom. "Hey, the door won't open." Mamiya looked to Mikage, who's was giving him a crazed look.

"Oy! Semapi!"

"I fear you're all on your own, Mamiya dear," he said faintly. "My path has not been prepared with me."

"By Dios! If I'd known you were such a coward, I'd never had agreed to this manic plot. You know what? Screw this. Where's big sis Tokiko?"

"Oh, you wouldn't want to know," said Akio, opening up the elevator door with ungodly strength. "You really wouldn't."


	3. Act 2 Scene 1

**DISCLAIMER: I am a fanfiction writer and I am not One Direction. I do not own SKU. Idid not write "Beautiful". If I did, please inform me and I shall self-destruct.**

"Hey, Kozue!" Miki said, dropping his notebook. The boy with his sister smirked, then disappeared. "Who was that boy you were with?" He crossed his arms disapprovingly.

"Shut up, Miki," she said, poking him in the chest. "You don't know anything.

"You are naive," she sang, hooking arms with him and leading him to the greenhouse.

"A nerdy bore,

To whom differential calculus is not a chore,

Don't need make-ups,

To bring grades up,

But when it come to bird and bees, you're just dumb."

"Everyone else in the duels can see it,

Everyone else but you," Juri joined in.

"Kiddy, though you play the keyboard like George Handel,

You've no idea how to act when you're around a girl,

But when you smile kinda blankly it ain't hard to tell,

You don't know,

Oh, oh,

You don't know you're ignorant!" Kozue proclaimed. Miki blushed deeply when she pushed him into the greenhouse. Himemiya greeted them.

"If only you saw what I can see,

You'd know why I protect you so desperately,

Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe,

You don't know,

Oh, oh,

You don't know you're ignorant,

Oh, oh,

That's what makes you ignorant!" Kozue shook her head as Miki stumbled around a conversation with HImemiya. Frustrated, Juri tugged him out of the greenhouse and steered him to the Student Council Room with an arm around his shoulder.

"So c-come on.

You got it wrong.

To prove I'm right

I put it in a song." They sat down at the table. Touga joined them, smiling provokingly at Miki.

"It's just not right," he joined.

"To call you shy,

When you always act like you are all-knowing, wise!"

"Everyone else in the duels can see it,

Everyone else but you," Saionji sang.

"Mickey you irritate me like nobody else,

The way your 'shining thing' gets makes you way too compelled,

But when you smile kinda empty, just too innocent,

You don't know,

Oh oh,

You don't know you're ignorant." Juri beat Saionji at cards in Miki's defense.

"If only you saw what I can see,

You'll understand why I envy you so desperately,

Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe,

You don't know,

Oh oh,

You don't know you're ignorant,

Oh oh,

That's what makes you ignorant," Juri sighed.

"Na na na na na na na na na na

Na na na na na na," shouted the whole Student Council.

"Honey, you may make milkshakes like nobody else,

The way that you fence so carefully make me want to yell,

But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell,

You don't know,

Oh oh,

You don't know you're ignorant!" Music soared from out over the balcony.

"Algebra isn't hard work for a genius,

But when it comes to hanky panky you can't see it,

And when you smile kinda blankly at dirty thinking you can't,

You don't know,

Oh oh,

You don't know you're ignorant,

If only you saw what we can see,

You'll understand why we can help but patronize you daily,

Right now we're looking at you and we can't believe,

You don't know,

Oh oh,

You don't know you're ignorant,

Oh oh,

You don't know you're ignorant,

Oh oh,-"

"That's what makes me ignorant?" MIki asked, clicking his stopwatch. "I'd better write that down." He scribbled in his notebook.

"Trust me, Mickey, that's not going to help," Juri said sadly.


End file.
